viking (@NOTVIKING )


Bio @notviking2
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Account created 04-02-2013 04:33:12
ID 1147039789

iPhone : lmao almost got evicted bc of this

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iPhone : her: i like it when guys roll up their sleeves so you can see their forearms

me: [looking down and realizing i only have two arms] fuck

iPhone : my girlfriend just told me some other dude is in her bed. i don't know who this "bobby pin" guy is but he's getting his assed kicked

iPhone : people who keep their toothbrush on the side of the sink closest to the toilet are psychopaths who fear nothing and hate god

iPhone : mom took away my i heart boobies bracelet but what she doesn’t know is that zane works at zumies on the weekends and can get me another one before i see him at lacrosse practice on wednesday. and maybe a twenty one pilots shirt too.

iPhone : anytime my self-esteem starts to get too high i remember that no one has ever used my pics to catfish anyone

iPhone : my favorite response to kevin hart stepping down from hosting the oscars because of old homophobic tweets is “y’all are so sensitive you wouldn’t have survived on xbox live in 2007” as if anyone is asking 12-year-olds who use the n-word to host the academy awards

iPhone : this standup club is terrible the comedian just keeps quoting the bible and their drink specials are just shots of wine