Mark Leggett πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ (@markleggett )

Mark Leggett πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™‚οΈ



Bio Matthew Broderick killed two women in 1987.
Location New Zealand
Tweets 12,1K
Followers 68,2K
Following 611
Account created 29-03-2008 00:35:20
ID 14248226


iPhone : Waiter: β€œToday's special is pea soup.”
Larry David: β€œThat was the special yesterday. How can it be the special again? It’s not β€˜special’ if you sell it two days in a row!”

(A few minutes later...)

Cop: β€œSIR! DROP THE GUN, NOW!”
Larry David: β€œKILL ME! DO IT, YOU FUCKING COWARD!"

iPhone : To all the people who keep saying they still have not received the book they preordered from me, and that they demand their money back: There’s no book, okay? There was never going to be a book.

I will now be taking some time away from the internet to avoid these toxic bullies.

iPhone : LOST IN THE WOODS? FOLLOW THESE SURVIVAL TIPS:
- Eat all of the berries you can find, as fast as possible.
- Throw any water you have on the ground. It doesn’t have any flavour!
- If you see a bear, jump on its back and hold on; it will instinctively take you back to your house.

TweetDeck : Twitter started out with people just talking about their lunch, then it shifted to being comedy-based. It’s clearly going to be all about politics for the next few years, but my guess is that it will eventually settle on being a website about proper care and feeding of parakeets.